Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Some people are an insult to circus freaks and they make "Deliverance" seem like a fun wilderness adventure.

Sarah said the float trip at "Shady beach Missouri" lived up to it's name as everything about it was shady. She said,"Last weekend has thus far been  the worst weekend of my life."
The first problem she encountered was a loathsome man  about thirty something  who wouldn't stop hitting on her. She said he had four children by four different women (Stupid women) and he had tattoos all around his man nipples. (Naturally enhancing his manliness;) He stood about 5'-3"and weighed in at around 250 lbs (This may be necessary information if a police report should be required) and he insisted  that Sarah loosen up - throw back a few. (beers) This same man had assumed the good fortune fairy had smiled upon him as he had heard that a lone single woman (Sarah) would be in his camping party and she would be bringing her own tent so he didn't  feel it necessary to bring a tent  for himself -Sarah doesn't know where he slept and apparently Sarah wasn't the only person who returned home disappointed.

Sarah described  another  strange scene where grown grandchildren had encouraged  their dear ol' Granny to take off her top and the timid old woman willingly complied.
 (gag reflex)
 Apparently she got a real nice set of shiny plastic beads in exchange for her dignity and self worth!
Needless to say the beads were - a- flying!

I'm told that  coincidentally two of our towns high school teachers were there - still living out their own high school glory days and that there were so many drunk half naked people floating down the river that it was like a log jam at a saw mill. Sarah said one man was bitten by a water moccasin  but he was too intoxicated to seek medical attention.
(But then again if I were bit by a snake I would rather be intoxicated too. Rip roaring drunk in fact.)
One of the revelers asked Sarah what she did for a living and she said, " I work in drug extraction" to which Mr.Charming replied, "Well did you bring any with ya?" - Sometimes you laugh alone.
And lastly there were a couple of proud  pregnant teenagers who looked barely twelve so basically Sarah's weekend was spent with a crowd of Jerry Springer show rejects and Sarah lamented,"Why does this always happen to me?"

*Sarah's got a bad sunburn on her back.
That's what happens when you refuse to ask for a hand - a roving hand.

   The thing about Sodom that amazes me is that often times people don't recognize when they're actually "in" Sodom  and to the consternation of  people like Sarah  they don't like anyone who doesn't "Play along." I remind myself often that these are the very same people who Christ died for and who meant more to him than his life did - people like me.


Melody K said...

Poor Sarah, what a weekend! What a bunch of losers.

belinda said...

It's a moral poverty.

belinda said...

Just like the spiritually impoverished creepers who keep leaving unwanted comments.

Adrienne said...

Ugh! I've had weekends like that...

Holly said...

Tell Sarah I am so sorry...but at least she has a good story... I need to have her meet my sister...

Cathy_of_Alex said...

I don't know whether to laugh or cry at this post.

belinda said...

Cathy had I been there I would have lost my temper and possibly put myself in danger. I cant handle this kind of crap in real life.

Generally, I start out calm and prayerful while I try to reason with the person/people. I show them love and support and remind them of how much Jesus loves them, then if I see it isn't going well I get angry and all Jesus freaky... Kinda like a verbal wrestling match. If my activity director is around he will remove me from these kind of situations.

I can't count the number of times I've gotten mad at people/strangers in public. I have to live on this planet too and there are children watching.