Friday, April 15, 2011

Dear God,
 I was wondering if you would consider making me a member of the Detroit Spinners and even though I'm a really, really white woman (practically translucent in fact) from Kansas and I have no rhythm or musical abilities  -what so ever , but not just a regular Spinner ( hidden in the back row), I wanna be the lead singer of the Detroit Spinners! I love their sound, demeanor, and their  outfits - a lot in fact. I love everything about them and as the presiding Spinner  I will draw attention to myself  and make it mostly all about me so as to raise awareness about the Spinners and to convert others  to the Spinners message  of love , peace, and perfect timing throughout  the world . Keep in mind dear God, that  I need  I wont take no for  an answer rather quickly because I'm not getting any younger. I do however,  have a few slight demands requests to make, small demotions, reductions, devaluations of their work, time and talent, which will essentially render the group worthless when I'm finished  ideas really, stuff no one would probably ever notice and would in fact enjoy if they did!

# 1 -  We could have puppets during the show, who doesn't love giant puppets?  Wait, that's been done before, ummm......... we could have clowns, mimes or finger puppets!
# 2-  I could dress like Toni Tennille and the men could wear sailor hats.  Keep  in mind  Lord, that I know all of the words to "Midnight train to Georgia."  -Just in case.
# 3-  I would ban all dancing at Spinner concerts, particularly on stage.  I'm uncomfortable about being rhythmically challenged , besides, I can't dance and sing at the same time.
# 4 -  I'm gonna have to ban the "fro" because I can't grow one.
# 5- I want to slow the songs waaaay down to be more inclusive and I'll eliminate any sad lyrics.
Lord, when I'm finished the Spinners will be unrecognizable and only a shadow of what they once were - great!
Dear God, If you should decide not to allow me to become a Detroit Spinner then would you at the very least make me a Soul Train line dancer?  Maybe, an Isley brother, Dear God, or a Temptation? Who doesn't  love Smokey Robinson!
 I've got some terrible terrific  ideas about those groups   because I can't let go of pretending to be something that I'm not nor ever will be so I'm going to make everyone else around me as miserable as I am  as well! 

Don't you  hate it when people ruin   the things   you love  the most?

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