Thursday, August 6, 2009

To my beloved children whom I adore.

Last week I was questioned by my Dr.Spock ( the child advisor Spock not the pointy eared logical Spock) as to why I was getting rid of yet another child's toy and he asked me , "are you not going to keep anything from your children's childhood?"
I replied, "no nothing , not a single solitary thing." "I carry the children in my heart but I don't have room for their things." In fact I am not emotionally attached to any of their things excluding some of their art work which I thoroughly enjoy.
I have tripped over too many children's rocking chairs in the middle of the night and
I've teared up from the excruciating pain of stepping on a rainbow of LEGOs
and hacked up Barbies from beauty school wannabes.
I've deconstructed a dizzying array of Lincoln log forts encamped for weeks upon my tables readied for battles that never came.
I've ate my way through countless nauseating Mc Meals to acquire a tote full of Mc Toys and now I would rather Mc Starve than ever eat there again and the toys are overflowing.
Now , when I see a Hot wheel car I drive it to the trash and park it there. I figure at least I will never have to pick this one up again.
I've operated on my fair share of talking toys having removed their voice boxes hidden deep within.
I have hidden flutes ,buzzers ,bells , whistles, and batteries.
And when a conflict over children's craft projects would arise I would tell the kids things like
" State Law prohibits" this or that . For example "State Law" prohibits child craft projects that don't fit properly in boxes so you must give all that you make away due to storage safety issues. Yeah , I know it doesn't make any sense but when your say ....., ten years old and someone throws some " STATE LAWS" in your face you listen and then you also begin to hate "law makers." Oh, you should hear my little ones complain about government laws. hahahahaha
I don't want anyone to have hurt feelings, ( God knows the counseling fees would cost us a fortune ) but I refuse to be burdened with the things that you don't really want because if you wanted these things then you would have taken them by now and yet you can't expect for me to treasure the things that you do not. It's not going to happen. I am not bitter nor am I angry but I am tired and I want to move on too. I don't want to live in your childhood shrine for the rest of my days. (I would like a hot tub with my life guard on duty but the sandbox turtle with the Tonka trucks are in the way ) And even though I love you dearly I still want you to come and get your crap .


Enbrethiliel said...


Belinda, I thoroughly empathise (though I have no children of my own)! You should be thinking about preserving your sanity (and from the looks of it, also your physical safety) today and not about putting up some sentimental museum tomorrow.

Anyway, you're saving some of their artwork, so it's not as if there will be no mementos of their childhood. =)

Adrienne said...

Oh Gosh - that is soooooo funny and sooooo true. My Mom was not a saver and my Dad was the exact opposite. I'm a bit of both but leaning toward Dad. It's a curse!

And those damn Lego's. My alcoholic attorney nephew was a teeny kid when Lego's came out. I bought him some sets to add to his collection (and they were so blasted expensive!!!). But I remember stepping on those bastards in my bare feet. Holey Moley!!

Pile the stuff in boxes separated by kid and give them a deadline. Gone by trash day or gone for good! Works every time.

Melody K said...

My mother-in-law (God be good to her) was a saver. She saved a bunch of her kids' toys for our kids. Among them were some very realistic rubber "creepy-crawlies". The boys had them dumped out on the basement floor, and didn't get them all put away. I was whaling on a rubber cockroach with a broom for about 5 minutes before I realized it wasn't real.
I got rid of most of their toys when we moved the last time. They were already in their late teens, so I figured it was safe. But one thing I wished I hadn't given away was their story books; though I did keep a few favorites. Now that we have a granddaughter, it would be nice to have them when she comes. Books are one thing that can be shared across generations.

Lola said...

ROTFL and Cryin' too!

I have to be selective otherwise the hoarding and guilt take over.

(I have thousands of photos still in the envelopes, dated and in order, but not going to do the scapbook with all the little cute cut-outs, exquisite papers and such...)

I have more important things to do like cooking and praying. Lots of praying.

belinda said...

The bugs were homemade from the "creepy crawler" bug making machine. It was one of my favorites. As a child one Christmas I had made a bunch of bugs for my relatives and then I had hurt feelings when they left them behind after the Christmas dinner was over.

I was 47 at the time.... no I'm kidding I was in 4th grade.

belinda said...

Lola , as a gift to my photographer I am reorganizing all of the photo albums. I have 13 more to go. I just want them to be in yearly order at this point. I am trying to get as much done as possible in case something should happen to me. Sad but true.

Vincenzo said...

"As a child one Christmas I had made a bunch of bugs for my relatives and then I had hurt feelings when they left them behind after the Christmas dinner was over."

So sad. I wanted that werewolf doll when I was little.

Vincenzo said...

belinda said...

Vincenzo, I like my new grouchy photo it's more realistic.

That's the ugliest photoshop job that I've seen in a while.