Remember when people with crazy ideas were only harmful to themselves.

Dear Diane, I was wondering which side of the fence you were going to

 fall on and I was on pins and needles watching and waiting.

*******************

I won!

I   WON!!

 "I"    WON!

"I"       "W"-   "O"  - "N" !

And I'm gloating shamelessly because I got my way!!

And - I LOVE IT WHEN I GET MY WAY!!
( In these matters)

You may be wondering what I'm so excited about? And why I'm being such a brat?

Well, I'll tell you.

My childhood friend who died of breast cancer last Saturday and who had been married  to a Muslim and  had stopped practicing her Catholic faith, died in full union with our Holy Catholic church and with  of all of the necessary graces bestowed upon her by our church through the Holy Spirit and authorized through Jesus himself  and  I know she's fine now and now she will pray me for me .

*I hope your not waiting until the last minute like she did because that was stupid.

It's gut wrenching for us to watch some of you people as you toy with Jesus.

Besides, I feel bad when I call up sick people and yell politely, yet firmly at them over the phone.

I hope none of you blogger people are still sitting on a fence. Don't make me call you.

Okay, so who's next? Form a line ;-)

I'm so happy that you won!!

Please pray that I can win too.

Darn!

Where are my white shoes!

A kid came up to me at our yard sale and asked , "How much do you want for this gun?"

I said, "A quarter"

He said, "Will you take ten cents?

I said, "No way, beat it kid."

(I'm kidding. I sold 'em the gun :-)

The mouth that roared.

I was listening to a Christmas song in the produce department at the grocery store when another old woman passed in front of me. She said something like ,"do you hear that?" I said yeah, I love the baby Jesus and all ,but I'm not ready to have Christmas shoved down my throat. In fact we could skip the entire thing all together and I would be happy. Then I said, "My children were talking about me around the dinner table and laughing with their father and said, "yeah, Mom is a fun sucker, she always likes to suck the fun outta everything that we do". Then they roared with laughter as I told them to go clean their rooms.

BUT as I retold this story IN PUBLIC the first two constants of my words "fun sucker" got mixed up only I didn't realize it. Had my linguistics coach been with me he would'a been furious. She stared at me as I began to piece together what I had just said , and then to my HORROR I understood and as I apologized profusely she said, "that's okay dear", "I was raised by sailors" I covered my face with my itemized departmentalized grocery list and walked away in shame.

But then I got to thinking about the many times that I had cussed and had not been embarrassed about it, mostly in some sort of a fit of rage and it was then that I discovered that in the end the embarrassment will be so great that none of this will have been worth saying.

Again, I'm really sorry Father and for all of it, every word. Boy am I going to be embarrassed in the end.

Some people you just shouldn't mess with

because they have God's ear.

The mentally challenged, the orphaned and the widows.

God gives his complete attention to these people and it's not wise to cross them.

Jesus I trust in you.

Psalms
Chapter 46
1
1 2 For the leader. A song of the Korahites. According to alamoth.
2
God is our refuge and our strength, an ever-present help in distress.
3
3 Thus we do not fear, though earth be shaken and mountains quake to the depths of the sea,
4
Though its waters rage and foam and mountains totter at its surging. 4 The LORD of hosts is with us; our stronghold is the God of Jacob. Selah
5
5 Streams of the river gladden the city of God, the holy dwelling of the Most High.
6
God is in its midst; it shall not be shaken; God will help it at break of day.
7
Though nations rage and kingdoms totter, God's voice thunders and the earth trembles.
8
The LORD of hosts is with us; our stronghold is the God of Jacob. Selah
9
Come and see the works of the LORD, who has done fearsome deeds on earth;
10
Who stops wars to the ends of the earth, breaks the bow, splinters the spear, and burns the shields with fire;
11
Who says: "Be still and confess that I am God! I am exalted among the nations, exalted on the earth."
12
The LORD of hosts is with us; our stronghold is the God of Jacob. Selah

Even in death our beloved Saints give testimony to the glory of God.

I've practically been an angel since Paul's been gone.

I've been talking to Paul over on Facebook, but he

couldn't figure out how to talk with me on the "open chat" application.

(If I die first he's gonna be in big trouble.)

He was fun to talk to because I didn't have to watch what I said.

I wish that I would have typed something naughty to him like this....

................................................................

While you've been gone I took the MasterCard and bought some jewelery . A set of ruby earrings

or were they the emerald ones I got confused so I bought both pair,

and none of that fake crap either, and you know when you buy good jewelery

you can't just wear them with jeans so I went to Macy's and bought a dress, and fortunately it was modest, but unfortunately the price wasn't,

and because the card was denied, I filled out an application for a new one,

and presto change'o I had myself a beautiful new dress to go with those earrings.

Next I went to the shoe department, but I didn't buy the plastic ones with the high heels you know how I feel about plastic shoes when only real leather will do, then I ............

Well you get the picture. Credit card debt is very naughty at my house.

I miss Paul . Life isn't as funny when he's gone.

(If he dies first I'm gonna be in big trouble)

Paul doesn't think that I'm funny at all really.

He suffers you know.

God's grace is amazing , and if he can save Mr. Tyler then I assure you that no one can sin bigger than God can forgive.

Mr.Tyler is a Catholic boy. He celebrated his birthday this past week ,and he turned 61.
I never liked him until I saw him on television feeding the poor. Awww, I am such a sap. (Kiss a kitty or pat a kid on the head, and I swoon.)
Now I'm gonna go ,and listen to "Janies got a gun" or maybe "sweeeet emotion". He's still kinda too much for me.

I'm praying for you, and your family.

I am quite concerned about you , and for a number of reasons.

Mortification - Day 3 Parent teacher conferences about Kate's future.

I had a parent teacher conference that I was required to attend. There were five adults including myself who were scheduled to be there , and rescheduling was not an option. So I showed up with a migraine, a hurting hand , and a sweet bladder infection. When I walked into the conference room I heard one of the women say after she had seen me say , "oh , my"!
I thought to myself ,"I must really look like hell." I introduced myself reluctantly , and the school psychologist who sits in on all of the school meetings said to me, "hi , I am the school psychologist (public school) , and I am here to recommend help for Kate", and he started laughing , and then he said "I'm just kidding" ! "Just a little humor" ,

and I said, "your not funny" - "at all".
I embarrassed him in front of the other adults - I wasn't embarrassed - just really sick , and then I was angry too.

Jesus , I wished that I would have concluded my sentence with - "and your an ass hole".

Lord would I actually go to hell for that. I would have been telling the truth.

He scared Kate , and upset her.

I left the meeting early because the ceiling was starting to grow dark. I apologized , dismissed myself , and rested in the car until I was able to drive myself home.

Please God bless all of the wonderful people who help Kate , and it's so great that she's doing

6-7 Th grade math, thank you God . She is now smarter than I am.

God - please don't ever forget about Kate.

Someone is feeling better. (Thanks God)

Now we can drop him off in the forest like "Hansel",

but he knows how to find his way back home.

He's wearing his "camo's" so you can't see him .

He will be able to find his way back home by the trail of kleenexes that he has left behind.

Joseph's sick . I made the "jello" , and he took his own temperature.

He said, "Mom," "my temperature says's it's 6.66."
I said, "dude those are some bad numbers", "what's it say when you turn it around?"
99.9
He didn't do that right either. It's at least 102.0 but he talks so much while we take it that we may have to take it the "Old fashion way". You know the way that scars you for life. :0

Don't worry we really wont.

Anastasia "borrows" all of my face book friends.

Ana , you have 1,166 face book friends. That's more people than in many villages through out the globe , and bigger than some parishes. So why do we have to share my only 5 face book friends? Some people are sooo clingy. My children always want to know what I am doing at all times, and they want to know if I am talking about them, so I guess that's why, and besides my new face book friend Brian is super cute.

I wonder if he's Catholic? But I 'm thinking you've already thought about that too.

I love you so much Ana Banana, and I am glad that someone cares about me and wants to know what I am up to.

Send me a list of things that you want for us to bring before little siblings day ......

Afterwards can we leave Joseph with you ? He drives us crazy.

Besides he likes your room mate. :0

He's a simple boy -all he needs is a hammer , and some time.

*Hey, BTW I did notice that your sticking your tongue out at me.

(My kids always did it very discreetly)

It ain't easy being my kid.

Can you see that teeny tiny Aeropostale label at the top of this post? It's very important to Kate. Her sister Ana came home from high school once, and announced to us that , "the popular kids at school wear only "Aeropostale clothing" . Kate promptly emptied her closet, and ditched everything that wasn't Aeropostale. One fine cold winter Kate only had one pair of jeans, and a couple of tops left. She would wear skirts in the snow because she refused to wear her last pair of pants because they weren't Aeropostale either, and neither was her winter coat. You get the picture.
I took our Aeropostale clothing pieces that were too small, and donated them to the poor, but not before I removed the labels , and I sewed them into a sensible pair of jeans. I had her try on those impostor jeans , and she squinted her eyes at me , while I said " oh, those jeans are cute, and they're Aeropostale!!" She just stared me down , and said............ u m , y e a h.
Like that guy in the "office space movie". I said, "well they are" -"just look at the Label." She never figured it out, and she never wore those jeans. Kate now has a closet full of "Aeropostal" clothing, I pray to God that no one ever says's anything negative to her about her clothing . I don't want to switch out her closet brands again.

Deep theological reasons why Ana is in the "Cigar club" at her Catholic college.

Quote- "Because there is one really cute Catholic guy in that club,

and the smoking jackets are so cool. " ( Ana, boy's aren't really the reason why we go to college.)

I am glad that they wont let you smoke anymore since you had gotten so sick from it .
Maybe they could spring for some "Nicorette" patches ,
and all of you can just skip to the final phase of smoking.
Say , ask around and find out if there is a view master club.
Maybe then I would go to college too.
I already have a nice Catholic boy though ,but I can always make room for some more reels.
Your studying aren't you Ana,

that's the most importiant thing that you can do while your there.
Hit the books , and stick with that Mass club.

Oh, and always remember "sex will kill you",

and if by some strange fluke of nature you survive it , then Mom would kill you. :-0

Love you , stay warm, and eat a vegetable sometime, they come in different shapes, and sizes, and they are often "green" colored. Mom

These are the days of divine mercy. Come on, get on board - your time is running out.

Jesus said to Sister Faustina- "My great delight is to unite Myself with souls ... When I come to a human heart in Holy Communion, My hands are full of all kinds of graces which I want to give to the soul. But souls do not even pay any attention to Me; they leave Me to Myself and busy themselves with other things. Oh, how sad I am that souls do not recognize Love! They treat Me as a dead object.
http://thedivinemercy.org/message/

*Disclaimer- this is not a "Christian video", but still these people "get it"

The lovely Spring day that Dad brought home a "Weed Eater".

My father brought home this new invention one fine spring day back in the 1970's . My brother , and I had to use the old style hand clippers, and we would clip the entire circumference of our yard most every other Sunday - by hand, but even with our blisters we still clipped on.
My family wasn't religious. Only I was (I am a genetic fluke), and I use to sit on the ground , and clip , and talk to God. (just like today only now I use my computer) Occasionally I would attend a church located two towns away, but only if they sent their bus around .

My Dad was excited , and in a good mood on the day that he brought this "Weed-eater" home,

in fact we all were. (We were hoping that our clipping days were finally over. ) Dad began to work with his NEW weed eater holding it upside down onto his belly. He was trying to figure out if he had enough string in the bottom, and how to thread it through properly, he yelled at my Mom in his mean grouchy voice -to hold the other end and in a certain way too , but then my Mom who was holding the handle accidentally pulled the trigger , and it whips the hell out of my Dads belly, while he screams , but she didn't know that she was holding the trigger, and making it all happen, so she didn't stop. He looks at my Mom , and cusses like it's the apocalypse or something, and yells to her , "get your %#$@# blank, %$#$%%*%@# blank, hands off of the trigger Alice. My Mom replies, "oh Jim, I am sooo, sooo sorry". I didn't know that I was pulling the trigger. Then Dad composed himself- barely-, and you could tell that he was hurting, and really, really angry. At least he didn't cry , then they resumed the same position, and then Mom pulls the trigger- again, accidentally whipping his gut , and again we hear the hole litany of cuss words, perhaps even some newly created ones , then Mom pipes in again - "Oh Jim" , "I am sooo sorry," then Dad said something "smart- ass" like why don't you just kill me already, and at that point my brother , and I both kinda wanted to slap her too, because she was making all of our lives more miserable - much harder than it usually was, and it usually sucked to begin with...........

Today I think -"thank God that Dad didn't ask Mom to hold a chainsaw or else we would have been orphans - my brother ,and I.

Modern day mortification- It's another two-fer.

Kate decided to apply my make-up before I began a very long grueling day of shopping

- with three teens. I will be in a grumpy mood when I return. Brace yourselves.

I will try like heck to be nice. Maybe I will win this time.

Can you say "Clapper?"

I'm still dealing with the "Clapper" issue.

I have been unable to convince Kate that the "Clapper" would be a really crappy gift.

So I guess that tomorrow- bright, and early, I will be off to buy a "Clapper" from our local pharmacy beside all of the other "elder" aid products .

That word -"Clapper", just sounds awful - much like an S.T.D. that the school nurse warned us about in our P.E. class - back in 1979.

Ya know I would buy a "Clapper" for myself if I could get one to start the laundry for me,

or maybe the dishwasher.

Now that would be something that I would really want to have.

If it could produce a meal for us by me clapping then I would want to have several.

Heck if that were the case then I would have a clapper in pretty much every outlet in my home doing something productive for me, and creating a bunch of confusion.